By Lisa, Rocky Mountain Moms Blog
I used to lose my voice. A lot. Every few months I’d be unable to talk to my family in anything above a whisper, to yell at the dogs for chasing the cats, to conduct business. The hardest part was the conducting of business. I was an editor. At the newspaper. With several associates awaiting my direction … and protection from the publishing powers that be.
When I lost my voice I didn’t answer the phone — at work or at home. I had to recruit one of my staff to return my must-return calls and I’d e-mail those that could wait. I had to whisper to folks who would understand, remain silent around those who wouldn’t.
Then I was laid off. That was a year and a half ago, and I’ve not lost my voice since. In fact, I’ve found my true voice, my inner voice, my real voice, the voice of a person doing what she wants to do, when she wants to do it. I truly believe I lost my voice so often during my eight years at the newspaper because the voice I used there wasn’t my true voice, and my body was trying to tell me that.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” you’re likely thinking. It’s all coincidence. Well, if that were the only instance of my body letting me know what’s right, wrong and otherwise, I’d agree with you. But it’s not. It’s happened before. Only the time before, it was my stomach doing the talking.
Many years ago I wanted out of my marriage. There wasn’t really any big reason — my husband’s a great guy, our life together with our three young daughters was okay. But I wanted more than okay. Having married before I turned 20, I thought there must be something more out there, something cooler, something more romantic and something so much more than just okay.
So I wriggled, wrangled and finagled my way into a separation from my husband. During the process, I got horrible stomach aches. For months. Along with those aches came large medical bills as I underwent test after test to try to determine the cause. Yet I continued my quest for singledom and did my best to get along with my stomach.
Then, for a variety of reasons, my husband and I began a period of reconciliation. And my stomach aches ceased. My gut had been telling me the separation was a bad idea. Luckily I listened to my gut and thankfully, 20 years later, my husband are still happily married. My stomach aches, for which the doctors never found a reason, have never returned.
Okay, two instances of my body calling out. Big deal. But wait, three’s a charm. And there is indeed a third.
Not long after the tummy turmoil, I lost the use of my legs and most of my vision. Like far too many people in Colorado, it was confirmed by MRI that I have multiple sclerosis. But no “waa-waa, boo-hoo” here because I’ve learned more from that diagnosis, from living with MS more so than I have from any other bodily dysfunction, the importance of listening to my body. For when I don’t, when I push myself too much, spend too much time focusing on the wrong things, allow too much stress to control my days or struggle too much for control over circumstances in which I can’t or shan’t have control, my body tells me to back off. It clouds my vision, weakens my legs and says “Hey, control freak! Settle down, relax, let someone else take over the ruling of the world for now!”
So I listen. Because my body is right. Always. My body taught me to peace out, to find my voice, and to listen to my gut.
And my gut tells me that’s certainly no coincidence.
This is an original post from the Rocky Mountain Moms Blog, http://www.rockymountainmomsblog.com. Read more from Lisa at Grandma’s Briefs.